Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
女主：沉稳，聪明，善良，为人着想，大度，果敢，冷静 。
夫妻俩都有什么时候了还要相互冷嘲热讽，全程既傻还爽又好笑！北欧人民真是抗打哈哈哈哈哈
白发越狱者招谁惹谁了。肚子先坏了然后屁股又坏了。最后还让爆头。关于男主五个台球藏在那里是参考了于老师的做法。
7分。前半段真的很有意思啊，多重反转，各种设计，夫妻两个自以为能干掉对方，结果却是三个蠢贼黄雀在后。但可惜从蠢贼登场开始，故事就有些落入俗套了，无非就是传统的室内恶斗的剧情，最后老爷子机械降神的设计我不是很喜欢，不过也算是和瘴气氨的情节能对上。总体还是很值得看看的，哈哈~~~
只有血和淚才能和解的凶猛夫妻，很歡樂的暴力血腥，點到即止的屎尿屁，各種轉折驚喜不斷。
老头子出场最搞笑但他也便当的太快了点，船在水里转圈还挺美。
一个教授教文学的女知识分子，非常厉害的学者
维京人果然是很能打的，就是老爷爷死得太可惜了唉
男主：卑鄙，小气，懦弱，蠢，心狠手辣，冷血无情，无用，算计。
一次充满血浆意外的感情修复度假，还喜得事业春天www
我以为是法语。挪威啊。确实是那边的颜色。蓝蓝绿绿的。感觉我不会很喜欢。最近两天晚上看的都是血腥的。这个男的太烂了，虽然两个人都想杀对方，但是女的比男的强多了。几次救他。比如被强奸那个时候。男的幸灾乐祸女的被强奸，结果绑匪同性恋，女的知道男的被强奸还把它救了。但是这种鱼钩太可怕了……
一对貌合神离的夫妇相约去小木屋度假，其实两人都准备好杀死对方，然后独吞巨额保险金。但是三个逃犯的到来打断了他们的计划。
看得⋯特別開心和過癮。心情隨著編劇的狗血腦洞起伏不止。低級殺人計畫的較量和血腥笨拙的打鬥，讓不合理的戲劇化變得更加有真實性。和老公一起看的，讓接近尾聲的元旦假期夜晚迴盪著放肆的大笑。🍷👹🦴
3.5星。男主演技值2颗星。吓得失去尊严舔鞋那一段已经超越了一部血浆片本身！夫妻最后可能并没有再爱上，报警坐在露台上也是十分理智，但是还需要彼此，成年人的人性，禁不得深推
贼：又蠢又坏又TM好色成瘾，真可以。
一个园丁、三个逃犯和一位好父亲，五个条生命，哦，对了，还有一场属于两个人的犯罪……每十分钟给我一个剧情直转直下，可以，可以，今日欢乐源泉……
太墨迹，完全可以把片长控制在一个半小时左右。用袜子装球把人打晕之后既不补刀又不捆绑，刚刚上线了几分钟的智商立即又下线？
维京人的后代。😅女主上节目的妆容好看多了。
屎尿屁血浆炸到不行，剧本比较厉害，演员也很敬业，看到后面觉得卧槽还可以这样操作，牛逼，以及挪威也是战斗民族啊！！！
黑老三脱裤子我就知道男主要糟，笑到肚子疼。
Copyright © 2015-2023 All Rights Reserved
